On acting responsibly.
You build self-esteem though doing esteemable acts. The same goes for building up your self-worth.
Acting responsibly builds your sense of worthiness because you’ve decided you are worth the effort. You are worth healing. You are worth doing the work to have the life you want. Following those statements up with actions that confirm them is how you begin to heal your worthiness wound.
This doesn’t mean you need to be rescuing cats from trees or performing spectacular feats. An esteemable act is simply one you can feel good about doing. If you know you always wait until your trash is overflowing before you take it out, make the choice to take it out as soon as it’s full instead. There you go. You’ve done an esteemable act, and in doing so, have attached muscle movement to the belief that you are worth doing the right thing. Now that fact is being affirmed by your body, not just your mind.
It doesn’t have to be grandiose or complicated. You can start by just taking out your trash.
Making endless “I am” statements can have a positive impact on your self-image, but what’s really potent is following them up with actions so your body knows you’re serious! Sometimes when we’re addressing our worthiness wounding, making positive affirmations feels like lying. You’re saying things to yourself that have never “felt” true before, and suddenly you’re just supposed to believe them as core tenets of your identity?
Here’s a secret: it’s actually easier to ACT your way into a FEELING than it is to FEEL your way into an ACTION. You will not always feel worthy. I don’t wake up every day feeling worthy. If you always let your feelings dictate the actions you take, you’ll continue to self-sabotage. Making choices and taking actions that you truly feel good about, whether big or small, is an excellent way to stack up some “proof” that you are all the things you’re saying to yourself. Adjusting your self-talk is crucial in building self-esteem, but don’t let it become something that feels futile. Your self-worth flourishes when you act as if YOU are someone who is worth it.
(And you are 😘)
